Adam Ash

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Wednesday, June 28, 2006

How to give a blowjob without gagging

From one good thing
(http://buggydoo.blogspot.com/2006/06/e-mailbag-very-special-guest-star.html)


Question:
I have a question about getting past my gag reflex while giving blow jobs. I have no idea what's the best way to practice this. I've tried bananas, but honestly that was just weird. I never bothered trying to deep throat my ex because he was happy with a hand-job. The new boyfriend has expressed much interest in it, and I think trying to deep throat without practice first would be really awful. Any books on this? Recommended dildos? Anything?

Answer:
Indeed, but first let’s get our terms straight: are you conflating the standard-issue blow job with the X-treme sport called “deep throating,” (taking the penis all the way into the throat), or has the boyfriend specifically requested the latter? “Deep throating” has long had its place in the lexicon but it has not and ought not replace “blow job,” giving head,” or “going down on.” They are not at all the same thing.

If all you two are interested in is mouth-penis contact, you shouldn’t need a textbook or a night of, you should pardon the expression, “cramming.” You can practice a bit with nothing fancier or more banana-flavored than your own finger or a popsicle stick, just to determine how far back you can tolerate an oral foreign body before you need to expel it/back away from it. It does get easier with practice. Once you graduate to the real thing you will find that the more control you take over the process (you do the moving, he just lies there being happy he has a penis), the less gaggy you will feel. If it still feels overly intrusive or out of control, wrap your hand (spit into it generously first, as though sealing a bargain) around the base and move this in concert with your mouth. Some men can easily detect the difference but many don’t care -- friction is friction, after all, and warm, wet, and deep are usually good enough without having to get all picky about it. Most men enjoy a blow job, period, and few -- I cannot say “none,” but let’s not get distracted by the corner cases -- get off on making girls gag or produce involuntary Roman showers.

If you can imagine yourself practicing on a dildo and not immediately collapse in giggles you’re ahead of the game and I give you my blessing. Buy something realistically sized and inexpensive (jelly rubber, probably), pretend it’s attached to your boyfriend (the sillier the color the harder this is to carry off, I imagine) and see how deep, fast, and et cetera you can go without gagging. Keeping your neck straight and head slightly back are supposed to help, although the often-recommended lie-on-your-back-with-your-head-off-the-edge-of-the-bed position strikes me as ill-advised at best, since we are trying to avoid panic here and what could be more panic-inducing than having your airway and vocal capability cut off while somebody straddles your chest? Try lying prone or crouching, with the dildo upright as though projecting jauntily from your boyfriend’s pelvis as he lies on his back, and practice opening your throat as though chugging a beer or saying “Aah.” You may find, in time, that you really can control your gag reflex. The feedback provided by a real live boyfriend, though, in the form of appreciative gasps and groans, is a motivator the likes of which mere plastic, no matter how colorful, will never achieve. Not, at any rate, with today’s technology, androids and Replicants not yet having started rolling off the assembly lines and into our toy-boxes.

Faking it with inanimate objects will only get you so far; if you really want to learn you’re going to have to try it on the real thing. I don’t know your boyfriend but I bet he’d be game for a little experimentation. Just make sure that the session is approached as an experiment, and that neither of you brings to it unrealistic expectations of immediate, spectacular success. Nobody’s born knowing how to do this sort of thing, at least not until those Replicants get here.

If you two get this far and wish to -- oh, heck, there’s no better way to put this -- go little deeper, there is good information to be found in instructional videos/DVDs like the ones Nina Hartley puts out, or books such as Violet Blue’s The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio , which contains nifty tips like how to keep your lipstick perfect throughout, as well as yes, bona fide deep-throating techniques if that’s really what you wanted. I think deep throating is overrated, myself, but then I only borrow a penis and ought to defer here to those who possess them full-time.

One last word of warning: yes, there can be a somewhat unpleasant surprise at the end of a successful blow job. Inform him that he is responsible for early warning and withdrawal, no “whoopsies” allowed. This probably ought to be considered nonnegotiable at the beginning, subject to later review.

36 Comments:

At 7/09/2006 7:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This was great advice. I cannot wait to suck my man's cock. I was worried about deep throating, thought I would gag. But this advice will be useful.

 
At 7/10/2006 12:02 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I agree, some awesome advice. Actually there's also a great article on how to get past the gag reflex and how to give a blow job on this website: http://www.bjtutorial.com

 
At 8/08/2007 6:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

There are home remedies that you can get out of your fridge, and out of your cupboard that will allow you to bypass your gag-reflex. http://www.pornstartips.com has a whole bunch of info on that, and an ultimate guide on how to give a blowjob and blowjob tips.

 
At 9/20/2008 12:31 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have given many blowjobs *blush* and I agree with almost everything that you say in this article. In my guide on how to give head I give lots of tips on how to deep throat as well.

 
At 11/25/2008 2:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I actually read the Article how to give a blow job about home remedies out of your fridge that work. For me it was a sip of orange juice once in a while that worked.

 
At 2/02/2009 6:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

um I have a question when I suck my boyfriends cock what would be the rite posistion like the most comfortablest for him ?????? Please reply as soon as posible thank you

 
At 2/02/2009 6:15 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

when I suck my brothers cock and sperm comes out what happens if u swallow it ?? I really want to know

 
At 2/02/2009 6:18 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

when Im giving head to
My boyfriend and when the cum comes out do I show him that I'm not afraid to swallow it ?? Also another thing when I stand up and do head if he pushed my head to go faster of deeper does that mean I'm not doing well?

 
At 2/02/2009 6:22 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

if u know any one that would like a blow job for free tell them to contact me at Avery-Ann@hotmail.com I am a excellent cock sucker

 
At 2/03/2009 9:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I found this extremely helpful, as well as tastefully done. Thank you for your help.

 
At 9/14/2009 3:03 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, I don't think that when he pushes your head to go faster he means you are not doing good, I think he is just getting into it, but if he pushes your head up, then he probably does want you to stop.
And it is okay to swallow cum. It doesn't hurt you, some girls don't want to (plus, it isn't the best taste in the world). But I have before, and some guys are impressed if you swallow. I know my bf is. He says it makes it feel better when he cums if I have my mouth on it, and when you swallow, and have his dick still in your mouth, the feeling when you swallow turns some guys on.

 
At 11/05/2009 12:25 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i tried lying on my back on the bed while he practally fucked my mouth, and I can say it was not easy to do. Im pretty sure it cuts off your airway more than opens it.

 
At 11/13/2009 9:36 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i like when he fucks my face it helps to take it deeper it opens up my throat i think

 
At 4/02/2010 2:39 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i need help. i have absolutely no problem giving my man a blow job. i just have a problem with cum getting in my mouth. i realize that i can tell him to tell me when but what about pre-cum? anything i can do about that without using an actual condom?

 
At 8/09/2010 6:56 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I cannot wait to give head to a hot jock now. I wanna gag on his jock feet too! mmmmmm 8======D

 
At 10/22/2010 10:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is some good
Advice...i can't wait to suck my mans cock..

 
At 3/28/2011 3:26 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great advice! I gave my boyfriend head for the first time last night and deep throated it the whole time.... i gagged a few times but when i was done, i was really turned on and he told me it was great so im satisfied if he is. I definately dont mind doing it more often now.

 
At 4/26/2011 8:52 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cum does taste bad but when I am sucking cock I get into it so much that I don't mind and I always swallow. When I have spit it out in the past my guy looked hurt like I did not like this cum.

If I know my guy is getting close to blowing his load I take him deep and try to get as much of it to shoot down my throat and swallow the rest real fast so it is not in my mouth very long. Of course if you stop as soon as he starts cumming in your mouth then you might get shot in the eye with a load.

Also if you stop while he is still cumming then his cock is all nasty with cum and I don't want to put it back in my mouth. But if I keep sucking and I mean "sucking" now, like pulling on a straw, I can feel his cum hole open up and actually suck the cum out. That way I can keep sucking his cock until he tells me to stop, and all guys will tell you to stop soon after shooting a load.

I do not like the taste of cum but I do love sucking cock. Now if you pay attention to a few things you can know when you guy is getting close. First, his penis will stiffen even more and if he is a talker he will get quite. In addition his breathing will get quicker and shallower. But the number one way I can tell when a guy is about 10 seconds away from blowing his load is his balls will pull up inside of him. I usually try to make sure it is nice a warm where I am blowing my guy and I try to make sure his nuts stay nice a warm, this way it is super noticeable whey their nut sack starts to pull their balls up into them. When this happens you are about 5-10 seconds from the first shot. That is when you either have to bail or do what I do and take him as deep as I can and just "suck it up." I would rather swallow a load than get his cum all over my face, which I hate. All nice and neat to swallow.

One other thing. I picked this up from a working girl I was friends with, she said that she would squeeze the base of a John's cock really really hard, like supper hard, but make sure your thumb is on the bottom, that is the big tube the cum shoots through. She would squeeze that tube really hard with her thumb and it would prevent any cum from shooting out. The guy could not tell the difference as he would "cum" but not shoot anything out. She would keep sucking until she was sure he had "cum", then she would stop and lick her lips like it was really good and she had swallowed it all, then, and this is the tricky part she would have to put a wash cloth or bury his cock into the sheets because the second she released the pressure a huge gob of cum would shoot out. She said that a few times she forgot and released the pressure while the cock was still in her mouth and she got the biggest load ever, and a few times she forgot and relaxed the pressure while the guys cock was aimed at her face and she got quite the facial.

Now all that last is second had and I have experimented with that technique once or twice and it does work but in the end I still wind up dealing with cum and I would just as soon swallow it. My man loves it and I don't mind that much. After doing it for so many years it turns me on and I love that my man brags to his buddies about how good I am in bed.

Just to finish up, I am going to post this without a name, but I am close to 50 and have been sucking cock since I was 15, my first boyfriend had a huge cock and always came in my mouth and that is where I got started loving to suck cock. I have only had 11 lovers my whole life so I am not a slut but I have blown them all a collective, estimated 10,000 blow times, so I consider my self an expert.

Long live cocksuckers like me.

 
At 7/19/2011 6:15 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"close to 50...expert cocksucker" you are brilliant!! thank you so much for sharing your expertise!!

 
At 8/01/2011 5:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

from sweetz.. my man loves it when i give him oral, he pushes mi head down sometimes i think to far and it causes mi to gag... i want to do it to make him feel better. one night i kept gagging until i finally thru up and it was so gross how. i hve never went alll the way down on no one but i want to try it. wat is a gud technique that i can use on him with out throwing up??? help please...

 
At 4/16/2012 11:12 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm 13 And I Always Give Head To A Boy I Know. Here Are My Tips.
#1; Relax
#2; Keep Your Neck Straight
#3; Angle Your Head
#4; If You Can't Deepthroat, Wank The Bottom Of His Penis Whilst Sucking The Head And Top Half.
#5; Swallow His Semen
#6; Enjoy!

Happy Cock Sucking :)

 
At 6/15/2012 8:11 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My name is paul iv been sucking my boyfriends penis for years and I think practise makes perfect everyone likes it different I like it very creamy and he loves it too.

 
At 7/14/2012 4:41 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Really your only thirteen

 
At 9/15/2012 1:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow 13 &'Giving Advice On Giving Head. Whats Really Going On????????????

 
At 10/07/2012 9:33 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well...I only gave my first blowjob last night and I was so embarrassed because not only could I only get three or four inches in my mouth but when he came, I missed it because my jaw got tired and I was using my hand so I wouldn't lose momentum. He was totally sweet about it, but I still felt bad that I wasn't better at it. This article has helped me and given me ideas for next time though so maybe I can actually pull it off. Wish me luck and thanks a lot! I am 18 btw for those who are curious.

 
At 2/25/2013 1:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great advice! My gag reflex is defeated. It took practice for sure. My new man is packing a 10.5 inch dick (I measured hehe!) & he was shocked the first time I blew him. My bottom lip nestled up to his big balls with ease. Thanks!!!

 
At 4/10/2013 12:06 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

you just repeated everything that people said above that sounded good to you, haha!

 
At 5/28/2013 11:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay I am eight teen and I need help I tryed giving my boy friend head and well let's just say it didn't go well I had tears couldn't stop gaging so I need the fast easyes way for me to stop gaging because he is the one I fell in love with him the first time I saw him on a blind day and so did he plz can anyone help me

 
At 5/29/2013 12:06 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi so I am need some help now I know this is crazy but I have found my true love. Now I can give head but I cannot deep thraoting I have done the unthinkable and threw up I just want to making him happy in this way cause he make me as happy as I can be in everyother way posable and I promised when I meet him that I would not stop trying till I could make him as happy as he makes me in that way so if anyone could help me that would mean alot thanks waiting to hear back

 
At 6/08/2013 10:58 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My boyfriend really loves blow jobs but I can't do them I have tears in my eyes and gag a lot and I don't like doing it but I love him and want to make him happy so please help me ....

 
At 9/08/2013 8:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I simply do not understand a woman not sucking her man's cock and swallowing his semen. I would not continue to date her. I would even make her drink my piss for good measure.

 
At 9/17/2013 8:20 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You shouldnt even be sucking your brorhers cock ew

 
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At 8/23/2014 5:10 AM, Anonymous Danielle said...

For a perfect blowjob you need some examples, pictures more specifically. Not suck dick anyway, sucking dick is an art. In this process an important role is played by tongue the tongue must be very flexible.

 
At 10/29/2014 3:11 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm a guy a while back I gave my first blow job i messed up thinking cramming it down I can do it I start to gag. So if I loosen my throat with a dildo or Popsicle learn to relax my beck and tilt my head back good I'm gna start practicing

 

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