Adam Ash

Your daily entertainment scout. Whatever is happening out there, you'll find the best writing about it in here.

Friday, August 05, 2005

Brilliant parody of a feminist website

For general feminist news and issues, there is probably no finer site than Feministing. Now some guys have made a parody, and it is brilliantly hilarious. If you know Feministing, you'll chuckle your balls/tubes off. Even if you don't, you will. It's easily as good, maybe even funnier, than that parody of the New York Times many years ago. (Was that one by the National Lampoon folks?) I wonder who did it. They could start their own parody magazine, for sure, to rival the Onion. Via the excellent Brutal women.
Two samples:

1. A-Bombs Hit Women The Hardest
by Jessica @ 4:17 pm. Filed under Women Are the Real Victims
This week will mark the 60th anniversary of the atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. This gives us a chance to reflect upon the violence and try to learn some valuable lessons for today.
And the most important lesson by far is: When these cities were hit by the massive heat and blast-wave, women were the real victims.
In virtually every income and social level, women are at a disadvantage compared to men, and this also applies to atomic bombings. Ever since childhood, Japanese boys were conscripted into the military and sent to fight on distant shores. Therefore, they grew up with valuable training and experience in dying that put their sisters at a clear disadvantage when their neighborhoods were turned into smoldering rubble.
Violence against women is always wrong. And the flip-side of this is that violence against men is occasionally perfectly fine. Since this was a very violent atomic bombing, then logically all the violence against women was wrong but some of the violence against the men was okay.
Why is this? Well who built the bomb? Men. Who ordered it to be used? Men. Who dropped it? Men. And as for the men of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, what did they do? They probably just sat by and did nothing while women died around them. Therefore, they are also to blame for the deaths of those women, as are all men everywhere.
And if we view the bombing the same way we feminists view sexism, then there were actually NO male victims in Hiroshima 60 years ago. Or, if there were, it was their own fault because they’re the ones who start all the wars.
So to the men who died in Hiroshima and Nagasaki back in 1945, us Feministingers say: Stop your pathetic whining already! Yawn!

2. Raped Yet Again!!!
by karyn @ 8:30 am. Filed under Women Are the Real Victims
So today was at least my third rape this week. I wanted Kurt to do the dishes, and he said he shouldn’t have to since he hadn’t eaten at home all week and none of them were his dishes. He was being a real asshole about it, so finally I had to tell him I’d let him fuck me if he did the dishes. He said fine and did the dishes, and then - typical man! - he wanted to have sex. Well, I told him he could have five minutes because I had to get going. (Well, I didn’t really, but I didn’t want to waste more than five minutes on it.) Anyway, he started doing his thing, and I set an alarm on my watch so he’d know when five minutes was over. The alarm started beeping, and I said, “Okay, five minutes is up.” But he was just going away fucking me and it was like he didn’t even hear me, so I said, “Hey, Kurt, your five minutes are up!” And he said, “Huh?” and just KEPT GOING. Well, by this point I was feeling extremely violated, so I said, “Kurt, get the fuck off me! It’s been five minutes!”
You know what he did then? Well, he stopped humping me, but he LEFT IT IN THERE. And he said, “What are you talking about?” And I told him for the FOURTH TIME that his five minutes were up. And he said something like, “You were actually serious about that?” Um…yeah, Kurt, I WAS. So finally I pushed him off me. He said he hadn’t finished yet, so I told him to go whack off. And then you know what he said? He actually called me a bitch!
Anyway, then he left, and I’m not sure if he’s coming back. Good riddance, I say. What an asshole. I hope he comes back, though.

IF YOU CHECK IT OUT, click on the comments. They're often more hilarious than the posts themselves.

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