THE SEX REBEL OF JESUSLAND, chapter 108

108. DINNER WITH THE PROCTORS.

Adam entered Proctor’s house as a Blessed. He felt very powerful. Before he became a Blessed, his idea of getting back at Proctor was quite primitive. He had thought that he might fight Proctor – in a fistfight -- for being such a little cur. Now he felt that he had a right to his revenge. It wasn’t a matter of getting his own back. It was a matter of merely taking what was his due, because he deserved it as a Blessed.

“Adam, here you are,” said Ruth, her large breasts strapped down.

“Anything to drink?” asked Proctor. He was a Blessed, so he had liquor in his house, unlike Beloveds, who were only allowed soda and milk.

“Vodka, Proctor,” said Adam. He liked calling the man Proctor in front of his wife.

They sat at a coffee-table while Ruth busied herself in the adjoining kitchen.

“Your wife is sexy,” said Adam, and Proctor swallowed in that way he had of trying to cover up his embarrassment, a way Adam had gotten quite used to ever since he made it his business to embarrass the man who always came back for more.

“So I went through the ceremony,” said Adam.

“What ceremony?”

“I’ve been initiated as a Blessed.”

“Congratulations, Adam. Welcome to our ranks.”

“I believe you blocked me years ago when I had a chance.”

“I blocked you? Never, Adam.”

“I was told this by my editor. The point being he had rejected that silly book of yours and then you got upset because you thought I blocked you with my editor so you blocked me with the Patriot Board.”

“Oh, that.”

“Yes, that. Well, now I’m a Blessed too, no thanks to you.”

“I was foolish then, Adam. One does stupid things when one is young.”

“So you admit it, now, do you? You were lying before, were you?”

“It was so long ago. I wish I hadn’t. I admit I may have felt a little wronged, to see one of my underlings having a great success with a book while I couldn’t even get published.”

“You couldn’t get published because at the end of the day your book was dull, Proctor.”

“I guess.”

“Unlike your wife, who isn’t dull. How come a dull guy like you scored himself such a sexy wife?”

“Ruth loves me, Adam. We have a proper marriage. She is a Beloved and I am a Blessed. She knows how lucky she is.”

“She does, does she? Why is she lucky? Does she enjoy sex with you?”

“We have a proper marriage. Every summer we go to a Christian retreat where we work on our marriage with other Christian couples. We have the certificates to prove it. Our marriage has passed the Successful Marriage Protocols of the Bureau for fifteen years now. We get an A plus every time we go on retreat.”

“Excuse me for asking this, but would she do anything for you?”

“I believe she would, if I told her.”

“If you told her to sleep with me, would she do that?”

“I don’t believe I would ever ask her to do a thing like that.”

“Not to put too fine a point on it, she is a faithful wife.”

“Entirely so.”

“And you, are you a faithful husband?”

“Well, you know how it goes with us men, Adam. You yourself seem to have quite a reputation. It’s not always easy for us to be faithful.”

“So you’re unfaithful to your wife but you expect her to be faithful to you?”

“Why yes, of course. She is my wife. She is my servant. I am her Lord. I am a Blessed and she is a Beloved.”

“If I told you I fancied your wife, Proctor, what would you do about it?”

“I would be flattered, but I don’t see that I could do anything about it.”

“You could put in a word for me, Proctor.”

“What do you mean?”

“You could tell her that it would be good for your standing as a Patriot for her to sleep with me. You know you had me up before the Patriot Board before, don’t you?”

“Well, fortunately it didn’t come to that. I came to my senses just in time.”

“You had to be forced to come to your senses, Proctor. Now I feel I should return the favor, and get you in front of a Patriot Board, so we can be equal.”

“But I follow all the Approved Rules for an Approved Life.”

“Oh, I’m sure I can think of something, Proctor. Come to think of it, I might offer you a chance to come on my program.”

“You want me to come on your program?”

“You want to be on it, don’t you?”

“Oh, yes, indeed, I would be most grateful.”

“Well, think of it this way. Just lend me your wife, and I’ll lend you thirty minutes on national TV. How is that? If not, I’ll lend you an appearance before your very own Patriot Board. Doesn’t this seem fair, considering?”

“I don’t know what to say, Adam.”

“Think about it, Proctor.”

“You’re making a joke, aren’t you, Adam? You’re relieving yourself of a residue of anger.”

“On the contrary, Proctor, I’m perfectly serious. I’m a Blessed now, too, and I have certain privileges.”

“They hardly extend to my wife.”

“Well, we’ll see how you do defending yourself in front of your Patriot Board. We’ll see how Ruth would like to be the wife of a suspended professor who has to go off to jail.”

Ruth came in. “I don’t want to interrupt your conversation, but dinner is just about ready,” she said.

“Great,” said Adam. “Proctor and I are done with our discussion.”

“How long have you two been married, Ruth?” asked Adam, when they sat down to eat.

“Sixteen years,” she said.

“Well, he hasn’t grinded you down yet, has he, Ruth? You’re still very juicy.”

Ruth didn’t know what to say.

“Thank you,” was all she could muster in the end, as a smiling Adam waited for her to say something, while her husband remained silent.