THE SEX REBEL OF JESUSLAND, chapter 118

118. RUTH RELAXES.

Adam had asked Ruth if she touched herself, and she said no, and then she said the words he was trying to avoid: “I’m a good Christian woman.”

He put his hand on her crotch and stroked softly.

“Does this bother you?”

“A little bit.”

“Does it feel awful?”

“No, not awful.”

“Has he ever licked you down there?”

“No, I’m a Christian woman.”

Damn. Again. He really had to get her away from that.

“Do you mind it I keep my hand there?”

“It’s okay.”

He thought he could feel some wetness. He pried a bit. She made a little yelp.

“I’m sorry,” he said, and removed his hand.

“It’s okay,” she said quickly.

He looked at her and puckered his lips. She closed her eyes.

He put his lips on hers. Her lips opened a little. He put his tongue in a little. She lay still, her eyes closed. He licked her eyelids.

She smiled. “It tickles,” she said.

“I would like to lick you everywhere.”

She smiled again. “You’re funny.”

He licked her ear. “I want to lick you here, and here, and here.” He licked her earlobe, her neck, and then her nipple. She stiffened. “Just let me lick it. I’ll be your baby.” She giggled. He licked her nipple, an appendage astray on her big fat tit. She closed her eyes. He reached down and softly stroked her stomach. She did not stiffen. He watched her as she lay with her closed eyes. Her mouth opened slowly. Her breath came a little fast.

He felt beautifully evil. Like Ezra. Ezra would enjoy seeing this. What a way to crush your enemy. He rubbed her stomach, closer and closer to her crotch. Her thighs relaxed. He drew one finger very softly across her stomach. He stopped, then pressed down a little, then moved along, stopping along the way, until he got to her vagina. He let his finger lie there, and then moved it again, and then stopped immediately. He kept licking her nipple. Her eyes remained closed. He was sure her mind was concentrated on his finger. He moistened his finger. He felt for the little knobble. He knew he had found it when her mouth opened and shut, and then clenched a little. Her loins began to move under him. It was purely involuntarily. She began to moan. Then she spoke.

“Forgive me, Lord, forgive me.”

As Adam heard Ruth ask forgiveness, he also heard, launched from somewhere in the back of his mind, the words from the Bible that were read at his initiation.

“She will be consumed by fire,
For mighty is the Lord God who judges her.”

At the same time, he saw a wisp of hair fall over Ruth’s eye. Instinctively his hand moved the bothersome hair away. As he did that, his hand spoke to him.

Very considerate of you to move Ruth’s hair out of her face. But how much consideration are you really showing her? Why are you doing what you’re doing to her? Is she responsible for her husband’s actions against you? Didn’t you promise yourself not to be like the other Blesseds – not to mistreat Females? Even a Female who is a handmaiden deserves the responsibility from you to show consideration.

Up to now Adam had thought that he preferred Ezra’s loose view of sex to that of the Men of the Gospel. But now his hand brought up something else. The Men of the Gospel were suspicious of sex itself, but Ezra, who liked sex, was contemptuous of Females. Ezra saw them as nothing more than vessels for his desire. In its own way, Ezra’s attitude was as narrowly pigheaded as the attitude of the Men of the Gospel. Was Ezra any better than the other Blesseds? In fact, was he any better than Gay Rectal Revenge, who sodomized heterosexual men in videos to work out their insane rage against heterosexuality? What lay behind Ezra’s treatment of Females – a rage against them? Did he, Adam, have the same rage, simply because his first love had been taken away from him by terrorists? His hand asked him: are you not treating this woman the way the Men of the Gospel are treating Eve?

That was the lever that dislodged his old self into a new uncertainty of conscience. Adam felt his desire wilt – both for Ruth and for revenge on Proctor. His way of having his revenge had sullied the whole enterprise itself. He was being Satan vile. A typical Blessed. Unworthy of Eve. What he was doing to this one woman he was doing to an entire gender. He stiffened and removed his hand. Ruth opened her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m deeply sorry. I have sinned against you. Get dressed. I’m sorry I caused this to happen to you. It’s Satan vile of me. I’m sorry.”

She looked puzzled. Then relief spread over her features. She began to cry. “Thank you,” she said.

“Go back to your husband. Tell him I changed my mind because you are a good Christian woman. Tell him he should honor you. Tell him he is blessed to have a Beloved like you.”

“I will do that,” she said. She looked at him gratefully. She hadn’t started dressing yet. Adam felt a strange weight lift off him. A rock had morphed into a balloon. He had to work hard at getting his next words out.

“Will you forgive me?” he asked. He couldn’t believe that he, a Blessed, was asking this of a Beloved, and a Female at that. He was subjugating himself to a handmaiden. Eve would like this. Yet he had to ask. He felt he might be saving his soul.

Her reply came easily and gently.

“Yes,” said Ruth, and that was the end of that.