Adam Ash

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Sunday, March 27, 2005

She loves her husband more than her children

'I have been in many mothers' groups, and each time, within three minutes, the conversation invariably comes around to the topic of how often mommy feels compelled to put out. Everyone wants to be reassured that no one else is having sex either. These are women who, for the most part, are comfortable with their bodies, consider themselves sexual beings. These are women who love their husbands or partners. Still, almost none of them are having any sex. There are agreed upon reasons for this bed death. They are exhausted. It still hurts. They are so physically available to their babies - nursing, carrying, stroking - how could they bear to be physically available to anyone else? But the real reason for this lack of sex, or at least the most profound, is that the wife's passion has been refocused. Where once her husband was the center of her passionate universe, there is now a new sun in whose orbit she revolves. Libido, as she once knew it, is gone, and in its place is all-consuming maternal desire. There is absolute unanimity on this topic, and instant reassurance. Except, that is, from me. I am the only woman in Mommy and Me who seems to be, well, getting any.' Click here to read on.

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